I ship Jesus/Castiel/Dean now. Jesus is perfect for this threesome because he’s half God so he can handle Castiel and he’s part man. It works out perfectly. I mean who else would be a better candidate?
Between this and Gumby’s butthole, it is officially hiatus.
Am I just reading the wrong pwp, or is there very little 69 smut out there?
Ya know… I noticed that when I started reading more Destiel. There was more 69 fic out there for Wincest. And there was a good amount in the other fandoms I’ve been in over the years too.
I wonder why Dean/Cas just doesn’t strike a lot of writers as 69-worthy. *thinky face*
I don’t think I saw much of it in Mass Effect or Dragon Age either tbh.
And I hardly even see it on the spn kink meme, and you’d think that would definitely be the place for it. But I see far more a/b/o and bestiality than simple 69 sex. Apparently this fandom finds knot sex more entertaining I guess lol
I was in fandom before ABO fic became a thing, and yeah ABO kinda squashed a lot of other kinks. It gets more attention. I have a huge spanking kink, and there used to be tons of spanking fans/writers/readers for SPN, but as of a few years ago it’s dying down. I miss all the interaction and new fic 😦
You’d think with Dean’s oral fixation and Cas’ ability to not breathe, we’d see a lot of it. Angel the Series and Buffy the Vampire Slayer had a lot of blowjobs and 69 fics with emphasis on the whole “I don’t need to breathe wink wink” thing.
With Dean’s oral fixation, Castiel’s ability to forever hold his breath, and this fandom’s obsession with mouth fucking, you’d think people would naturally think AHA! SIXTY-NINE! And come on, there has to be an Impala joke in there somewhere.
Destiel fandom, I am disappoint.
Granted I’m not a Wincest fan…But 69ing should be easier on Destiel. They’re closer to the same height.
I dated a guy who was 14 inches taller than me…above the waist.Things in bed were fucking awkward.
That is an excellent point. I’ve been in the same situation, and “fucking awkward” is an accurate description for a few reasons lol
My artwork for this year’s SPN Holiday Mixtape with @scones-and-texting-and-murder. As usual it was such a pleasure working with her, thank goodness for her endless patience with my constant art angst. Go read One for Each Night, it’s the perfect Destiel holiday goodness! ❤
Sam: So there’s multiple universes out there. Amazing.
Dean: There must be billions, trillions even
Sam: Yeah! And in each one something is different.
Dean: One where we aren’t hunters
Sam: One where I drive a motorcycle
Dean: A world where you’re the short one
Sam: A world where you’re fucking Cas
Dean: …
Jack: Actually that’s most worlds… including this one.
Dean is a witch, Cas is his familiar. They get bullied a lot. (Based off of this.)
Dean is used to idiots making fun of them: ever since he and Cas found each other, he’s been called everything from impotent to fairy princess. This is probably because Dean wears a leather jacket and jokes about his perky nipples… and his familiar is a delicate-looking, pretty blue swallow.
Cas, in his bird form, is fluffy and adorable. When he’s disgruntled, he puffs up to like twice his regular size, when he’s happy, he chitters and sings and flaps around like a goddamn rocket. He pecks people when he’s pissed.
He’s also ridiculously powerful.
Which, honestly, goes a long way to showing up and flipping off any and all assholes, but Dean’s favourite part of those whole process is this, right here: the moment when Dean raises a brow and goes “I’d quit if I were you, man. Cas ain’t a fan of bullies.”
The other dude sneers in his face, pushing at Dean’s shoulders. “What’s the little birdie gonna do, huh? Bitch slap me?”
It takes all Dean’s self-control to stay put, but he does. Because this has happened a million times before and will continue to happen. Because people are dicks, and the look on their faces after being dealt with are ten times better than any fist fight Dean starts.
Sure enough, as the asshole moves in to shove Dean a second time, Cas flits off his leather-clad shoulder, lands smoothly on the concrete with human feet. Or, well, boots. Heavy leather work boots, topped with ripped blue jeans and wearing an AC/DC t-shirt. He’s got on of Dean’s flannel’s on top of that, and finishing the ensemble is an over-sized denim jacket covered in anarchist patches and buttons. A handful of leather bracelets adorn his left wrist, and there’s a bandana wrapped around the ankle of his right boot because the lace is broken. Castiel Novak is a grumpy, sweet, six-foot tall dude with a perpetual bedhead and day-old stubble, and his feathers match the blue of his human eyes.
The asshole’s own eyes widen at this new development, taking a step back as Cas steps forward, hands curling in the other’s loose shirt. “The little birdie,” Castiel says in his deep, gravel-rough voice. “Will indeed bitchslap you. Before cracking your skull and divesting you of all your pathetic, small-minded ideas about masculinity.” Cas smirks when the guy basically gulps. “Unless,” he says good-naturedly. “You have something to tell us? Us being, of course, myself and my boyfriend.”
“Wait a sec, you two are—”
“Cracked skull, wastoid.” Cas shakes him a little to scare him, and Dean can tell the mouth breather almost pisses himself. His heart swells with pride.
“I’m sorry!” the other guy blurts out. “I’m really sorry! You guys aren’t fairies, o-or anything! You’re–You’re—”
“More powerful than you,” Cas helpfully supplies.
“Yeah, that! A-And—”
“Ruggedly handsome.”
“Uh huh!”
“And better than you in literally every possible way.”
“Yes, okay?! Yes: you’re better than me in every way. I’m sorry! Just leave me the fuck alone!”
“Gladly.” Castiel then pushes the asshole so that he ends up flat on his ass, palms scraped up on the pavement as he turns to Dean with a quirk of his mouth. “You ready to go?”
“Yeah,” Dean grins back. He moves up to press a quick kiss to his mouth, and Cas, adorably, blushes. “Careful on the turns, though.”
“M’always careful,” Castiel grumps. Still, he laces their fingers together as they walk towards his ‘66 Triumph Bonneville, tossing Dean a helmet as he slides his own over his head. Cas straddles the bike and grins when Dean presses himself behind him and holds on tight. Castiel revs the engine and they take off.
The guy, sitting dumbly on the ground, stares after them.
“We’ve got a no smoking policy,”
the server says as he drops off their drinks. “So no cigarettes.”
“We’re outside,”
Balthazar protests. “We’re on the patio.”
The server stares down at
Balthazar, looking less and less impressed with him as the conversation went
on. “Still drinking our drinks and eating our food, aren’t you?” He doesn’t
wait for Balthazar to respond. “So still the restaurant, ain’t it? Put out the
cigarette, or leave.”
Balthazar appraises the man in
front of him as he puts out the cigarette. “If I were to ask to speak with your
manager…?”
“Then I’d be happy to inform you
that I am the manager. And the co-owner.” His expression softens
a little. “Look, we got guests who come in with allergies and stuff. As someone
with a cat allergy, I totally get the not breathing thing. We try to make it as
comfortable as possible for everyone. So no smoking.”
Now Balthazar’s interest is
piqued. “You serve at your own restaurant? How… plebian of you.”
“That’s
what you got out of everything I said?” The man shakes his head and stares at
Cas, who’s quietly been smirking at the whole exchange. “Honestly, Cas, where
you get these guys?”
“Cas?” Balthazar repeats
suspiciously.
“Balthazar is an old friend from
college. He’s something of a culinary snob, and I knew only your burgers would
do.” He gestures between the two men. “Balthazar, this is Dean. Dean,
Balthazar.”
“Awesome.” Dean winks at Cas
before turning back to Balthazar. “Guess if Cas is vouching for you, you can’t
be half bad. I’ll be back with your burgers in a bit.”
As soon as he’s out of earshot,
Balthazar rounds on Cas. “I can’t believe you took me to a restaurant just so
you could flirt with the hot owner.”
Cas blushes. “I didn’t—that’s not
why—”
“Oh, hush.” Balthazar rolls his
eyes. Cas has always been so damned obvious about this sort of thing. He
remembers Cas drunkenly crying to him about that Daphne girl after (badly)
flirting with her at a party. Of course when he’d sobered up, he’d been too
embarrassed to ever talk about it again and had avoided Daphne like the plague.
“Clearly you need my help. The poor man’s as into you as you are him, and you
two are such idiots neither’s made the first move.”
Seconds later, Dean drops off
their burgers. “Farmer’s Market for you,” he says as he sets down Balthazar’s
meal. “And Honey Mustard Delight for the angel,” he says as he places Cas’
burger down.
Cas digs in and Balthazar wants
to smack him for being so oblivious. “Seriously? Was that not clear?”
“What?”
“He called you angel.
That, Cassie, is a flirtation if I ever saw one.”
“No it wasn’t. He’s just being friendly.”
Even Cas looks like he doesn’t quite believe it.
“Either you ask that man for his
number, or I’ll do it for you. We are not leaving here until you do it.”
Balthazar continues to glare at
Cas menacingly whenever Dean stops by their table to check on them, but Cas
remains frustratingly quiet. Honestly, Balthazar doesn’t know how much more
pitiful longing he can take before he goes stabs himself with his butter knife.
That would have to be less painful than watching these two bumble
through a courtship.
When Dean comes to pick up the
check, Balthazar shoots Cas a warning look. Cas tries to ignore him, so he
kicks Cas under the table.
I hate you, Cas mouths before turning to Dean.
“Dean, are you busy this evening?”
“Huh? Oh, I don’t think so.
Benny’s comin’ in to take over the night shift, so I won’t be working if that’s
what you’re asking. Why, what’s up?”
“Would you be interested in
maybe… going out for dinner? With me, I mean, if that wasn’t clear—” Another
kick stops his babbling and forces a somewhat pained smile.
“On a date?” Dean asks slowly.
“Yes?”
Dean smiles brightly. “Sure
thing, Cas. You mind swinging by the restaurant around five? If we’re going out
on a date, I wanna show off you off in my Baby.”
Balthazar’s head whips around at
that, but Cas seems to understand whatever the hell that
means, so he doesn’t say anything.
okay but what about witch!dean, and familiar!cas where cas is a swallow??? and dean is constantly made fun of for being like a fairy princess or whatever because cas is so small and cute and pretty but SURPRISE the dude is hella powerful and SURPRISE AGAIN it turns out that in his human form, castiel novak is this tattooed, grumpy, scruffy, messy-haired guy who wears an over-sized jean jacket covered in anarchist patches and drives a triumph.
Dean is a sheriff in a tiny town in Colorado, restless and unsatisfied with his life. It’s not what he’s read about in the dime novels since he was little, capturing dangerous outlaws and being the last word of the law. More like tossing the town drunk in a cell to sober up when he gets a little too rowdy. But his chance comes when a thief rolls through their town. Dean pursues the thief, and that puts him right into the path of Emmanuel, a notorious outlaw. When he’s captured by the outlaw and his gang to be held for ransom, he starts off on a journey he could have never envisioned, and learns that perhaps there’s more to Emmanuel than meets the eye.
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