Dramatic Clothing

So many ships omg. lol

Abaddean is totes evul because….

Abaddon is literally a Knight of Hell and Dean’s just a human so she has more power and therefore power imbalance.
She touches and creeps on Dean without his consent!
Abaddon is in the body of the woman who had a crush on Dean’s grandfather so that’s… creepy and weird.
Also everyone knows if you’re possessing a body and the host has long since departed and someone else is now occupying it, it’s necrophilia.
He killed her??? Canonical murder means the ship is wrong and gross and their relationship is always bad.
Age gap again. Huge evil age gap!

Eeeevul rating: All kinds of nasty ideas/10

Dreamhunter is totes evul because….

Claire is white and Kaia is Native American and therefore Claire has power and privilege over Kaia. (I’m not fucking kidding, I’ve seen variations of this argument for other ships.)
Claire is a horrible evul stalker because she just showed up when Kaia was in the hospital and tried to user her connections to get information about her.
Kaia is implied to have used drugs and that’s not good or cool and won’t be good for their relationship.
Claire has anger issues so she could be a very bad person for Kaia to date.

Eeeevul rating: Squiggly rift in the universe/10

Samwitch is totes evul because….

Rowena tried to kill him and his brother at least a couple times.
Also Sam is supposed to murder her so like… why would you ship a woman with the man who’s supposed to murder her???? Hmmmmm
Age gap.
Rowena’s an incredibly powerful witch so she could turn Sam into a bug and step on him. They can never be equals ever.
She calls him Samuel and that’s the name of his evil grandfather so she’s by extension calling him evil and that’s not okay.
Height difference.
Sam wouldn’t let her leave a room one time by physically restraining her. Also, that’s not taking into account all the times she was a prisoner in the bunker.

Eeeevul rating: Teacup/10

peanutbutter and jelly is totes evul because….

It’s blatant jelly/toast erasure.
Some people?? Are allergic??? To peanuts???
Bread literally holds this relationship together. Do you really want to food items together that need the support of a third? I don’t think so.

Eeeevul rating: Disappointed Kindergartner/10

Hando is totes evul because….

Lando told Han he hated him. In canon. Lando hates Han how dare you ship them!
Lando cheats at saabak. That’s not good boyfriend material.
Han’s a former imperial who became a smuggler. He’s a criminal who makes poor career choices.
Han has no respect for Lando’s cape closet and therefore the rest of Lando’s space. Look at what he did to the Falcon? Han is a slob with no respect for anyone but himself. He’d put all the chores on Lando and that’s unequal division of domestic labor and that’s bad.
Lando betrayed Han! He betrayed him! Betrayal is serious! No amount of turning it around, saving Luke and Leia, then fighting for the good guys can really make up for that, can it? The answer is no.
The three year age gap is barely acceptable.

Eeeevul rating: I hate you. I know/10

Luke/Dramatic Clothing is totes evul because….

Capitalism
It’s literally, canonically, a relationship where Luke *uses* his clothing. That’s abusive and Luke is scum.
Swooshing is inherently evil. Only villains swoosh.
He blatantly stole it from Obi-Wan.

Eeeevul rating: Gucci Boots/10

Send me a ship and I’ll be facetious about why it’s totes evul!

Oh oh why is Stucky evil I wanna knooooow

Forgive me, it’s been a long time since I watched the Cap movies. Also some of these sentences made me gag.

Stucky is Totes Evul because….

Bucky tried to kill Steve and Steve’s friends and, brainwashing aside, he shouldn’t do that. Also being a bad guy against your will doesn’t excuse the fact that you were a bad guy and should pay for it. ~~(Sorry, I just threw up in my mouth a little.)~~
Power imbalance because Bucky is disabled and Steve is a super human with all his limbs and we all know able-bodied partners have more power in a relationship than disabled partners.
Codependency, I guess.
They’re brothers-in-arms and therefore like family so shipping them is incest, apparently.
They’re like hero/sidekick so that’s like boss/employee which is terrible and gross.
Bucky was Steve’s friend/idol when they were kids and teen!Steve looked up to him so therefore their relationship has to be gross because no one ever looks up to their partners (especially when they’re young and experiencing crushes and stuff for the first time).

Eeeevul rating: 1942/10

Send me a ship and I’ll be facetious as hell about why it’s totes evul!

Sastiel and Finnpoe

Sastiel is Totes Evul because…..

Height difference again! Vile!
Cas is literally older than dirt so Sam is basically a baby to him ewwww
Cas is an angel so he’s got way more power than Sam does and therefore he could do anything he wants to Sam so power imbalance.
Cas literally broke Sam’s brain one time.
Where was Sam when Cas was dying because his grace was fading? Looking for his demon brother? Well that just shows he cares more about the safety of others than his friend so that’s not good for a relationship.
Sam once *hugged* Cas without getting verbal consent. Bad.

Eeeevul rating: 🐊/10

Finnpoe is Totes Evul because….

Poe just decided to name Finn without asking??? Rude??? Also it means Poe obviously doesn’t respect Finn’s autonomy and personal choice.
Poe was just all “keep my jacket” like a boyfriend you’ve been seeing for a while thus assuming a lot about their relationship.
Also Poe killed Finn’s friend on Jakku so… yikes.
Finn was all “where’s Rey? Where am I? Are we okay?” And didn’t even bother thanking Poe for anything he’s done so like… super ungrateful.
Poe is technically Finn’s boss now so that’s a power imbalance.

Eeeevul rating: 🚀/10

Send me a ship and I’ll be super facetious about why it’s totes evul!

Wincest and Reylo 😈

You get me. You really get me.

Wincest is Totes Evul because….

There’s a height difference and everyone knows that height differences are bad because… reasons.
Age gap! Like four whole years worth of an age gap! Age gaps are inherently problematic!
They’ve both died a whole shit load of times and everyone knows that when a person dies and their spirit leaves their body it’s necrophilia.
Power imbalance! Dean was Sam’s caretaker for a time growing up so that means, despite the fact Sam’s a grown ass man who moved away, has mad his own choices, and literally held the devil at bay, Dean will always have power over him.
They yell at each other a lot when they fight 😦 and good relationships never involve yelling ever.
They’ve punched each other a lot and possession isn’t a valid excuse for beating up on people. They should’ve tried harder to not be possessed.

Eeeevul rating: 10/10

Reylo is Totes Evul because….

Another height difference! So bad! He’s too tall. He would crush her!
Ten year age gaps are even worse than four year age gaps! She was a toddler when he was a teenager. Is that the foundation of a good relationship? I think not!
Rey shot first. She tried to kill him 😦 And then later she slashed his face open and that’s totally abusive guys. Fighting in a life or death situation aside, that’s bad. Rey wouldn’t make a good girlfriend.
He’s a super mega evil Machiavellian evil guy and she’s a precious uwu cinnamon roll so it would never work out.
Rey’s always yelling at Kylo and calling him names. Good relationship don’t ever involve yelling for any reason.
He’s king of the galaxy and she’s a former scavenger so their class difference means they’ve got a power imbalance. Everyone knows rich guy/poor girl romances are NOT A THING.

Eeevul rating: 87/10

Send me a ship and I’ll be facetious as shit about why it’s totes evul!

rosemoonweaver:

I’m in a salty, facetious mood today. The temptation to play games mocking this “ship negativity” is soooo strong. Everything you love is Capital-P problematic. Everything.

You know what? Screw it.

Send me a ship and I’ll tell you why its Totes Evul and I’ll even give it an Eeeevul score.

Hello there! ;) 17 and 25?

General Kenobi. 😉

17. what is your favorite line?

“Luminous beings we are – not this crude matter”

25. which character do you have a love/hate relationship with?

This is a hard one. When it comes to Star Wars I pretty much only have characters I love or love to hate. There are only a handful that I actually legitimately hate.
I guess the closest I come to a love/hate relationship with any of the characters is how I feel about Anakin. I love Anakin for who he was, particularly in TCW because there’s a lot to love about him. He’s a good person who loves fiercely and fights valiantly. He’s willing to do anything and that winds up biting him in the ass so he frustrates me a little bit. Like, more than anything he just makes me sad. His relationships with Obi Wan and Padme and Ahsoka make me sad because you have this guy who is pretty genuine, makes a good friend and father figure, a loving husband (though there are little moments here and there that make me side-eye him a bit *cough the Clovis arc cough*) and an intelligent general and he just… falls. I understand why, but still, it’s disappointing. I don’t hate him by any means, but I do get frustrated with his situation and sad because I think about all the things that could have been.

Thanks!

Star Wars Asks!

Alphabet Asks! T, U, V <3

Sorry it took me a bit to answer this, I was at the store.

T – Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending?
Snoke is a lying liar who lies and that mental connection Rey and Ben have was there before he did anything to it. I just honestly can’t believe a word that comes out of that raisin man’s mouth. He manipulates the situation whenever it suits him best so why wouldn’t he try to twist it and make it seem like he was in control of everything the whole time? Bottom line, that bond between Rey and Ben was there waaay before either of them knew the other even existed. Rey and Ben are soulmates bound by the force.
U – Three favorite characters from three different fandoms, and why they’re your favorites.
Dean Winchester from Supernatural. I like Dean a lot. He loves deeply and fiercely and would carry the weight of the world on his shoulders alone if it meant no one else had to suffer. He’s a bit of an impulsive ass but he’s got a good heart.
Diana Prince/Wonder Woman from DC. Diana is like, the exception to my rule about not liking perfect characters. I love her. I love that a lot of her strength comes from her compassion and that she chooses to stand up for others not because it’s a burden or obligation but because she wants to. She’s exactly what a super hero should be, in my opinion.
Ben Solo/Kylo Ren from Star Wars. See below lol.
V – Which character do you relate to most?
Kylo Ren/Ben Solo.
I look at Ben and I see myself. I see the person I was and the person I still am to some extent. I know what it’s like to feel like you have to be a certain way, even when there’s something inside of you that keeps pulling you in the other direction. I know what it’s like to live that conflict, to feel like there’s something wrong with you, and to hurt other people so they’ll get leave you alone and let the darkness swallow you. I know what it’s like to be hurt and let down by people everyone else thinks couldn’t possibly be a disappointment. I know what it’s like to have a voice whispering in your head that you’re not good enough, that you’re the screwed up one, to be unable to live up to the ideal of the person you think you need to be. I know that anger. I know that fear. I know that desperation.

Thanks!

Alphabet Asks!

B, N, and O!

B – A pairing–platonic, romantic or sexual–that you initially didn’t consider, but someone changed your mind.
Sastiel, actually. I hadn’t considered it until I started talking more to you because it was something I more brotp-ed but there’s a lot of potential there. I credit you with getting me to consider and ship it.

N – Name three things you wish you saw more or in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice).
Sex worker positive fics where no one needs to be “saved” from their profession.
Alternate canon where story threads that were dropped are really delved into. (Particularly with SPN)
Creature fics.

O – Choose a song at random. Which ship or character does it remind you of?
Fistfight by The Ballroom Thieves is such a reylo song. Good god.

The day I finally met you like I knew I would

You raised me from the wreck of my doubt

You were smiling to yourself as if we both understood

The silent language of the anguish of a heart that sings but doesn’t make a sound
What did I do to deserve you?
How did you find me?
I was already halfway gone
You were a bright light
You were a fistfight, oh

Like, damn I couldn’t’ve picked that better if I tried.

Thanks!

Alphabet Asks!

Alphabet asks! D, M, X 😊

D – A pairing you wish you liked but just can’t.
For SPN it’s anything with Gabriel. I dunno, he’s just not my favorite and I don’t really like any of the ships I see him in. It does nothing for me.

M – Name a character that you’d like to have for a friend.
Sam Winchester. I mean, I definitely don’t want him as my enemy, but having Sam as a friend would definitely be a good thing. He’s compassionate and supportive and I’d probably have more in common with him than with Dean (on a personal interest level. Dean and I have more in common in terms of burdens and angst).

X – A trope which you are almost certain to love in any fandom.
Enemies to lovers. It doesn’t matter if it’s the watered down version where they’re business rivals who sabotage each other or actual enemies who want to kill each other, I love this trope. The character growth that can be achieved when two people who hate each other have to put that aside and realize they’re not that different after all is one of my favorite things.

Thanks!

Alphabet asks!

Nuts. Can i give you four? cause i keep thinking of Dean Cas AND Jimmy (for multiple reasons but also because of the DCJ BB from last year) but also i’ve recently been associating you with Rey :D

You totally can lol.

I had a feeling Dean, Cas and Jimmy would show up as a unit. I do love my ot3. And no matter what I think I associate you with these three, too, especially after the work we did on the bang last year. 🙂

I’m getting a lot of Rey answers lol. It’s the icon, isn’t it?

What 3 Characters Do You Associate Me With?