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If I had more time and energy, I’d write meta about Star Wars, but I never seem to have the time, energy, or really the audience for it.

A thought that’s been on my mind recently is the metanarrative of Star Wars and how we’ve gotten so damn cynical. TLJ kind of seems to feed into this a bit (on the surface it rejects legacy, rejects the whole plot of Poe being a Hot Shot With A Plan So Crazy It Just Might Work, and Ben’s whole everything) but it really doesn’t. TLJ rejects the idea that legacy is the only thing that matters, even pointing out through Luke that sometimes it can go to your head and cloud your judgement, but ends with Han’s dice as, in my opinion, a reminder that what parts of family (Or cultural or w/e) heritage you uphold are up to you. Poe’s story is a warning against arrogance. Ben himself is a call back to every important character in the saga and when he’s not leaning on the fourth wall he’s kind of a symbol for all of this – his darkness and his fate is the symbolic darkness and fate of everyone who came before.

But all that aside, the historical context these stories are present in puts an odd weight on the story. The conversations around the story shapes the interpretations of the story and these characters in a very strange way that’s both disheartening and fascinating.

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I’m really hoping that we get some Finn/Ben interaction on EP 9. I think it’s likely to happen, but I really, really need it considering the way they left it on Starkiller.

They’ve been set up as narrative foils and embodiments of each other’s worst fears (for Finn it’s that the FO can and will come after him and he’ll be unable to get away. For Ben, it’s that he’s unworthy of any part of his family’s legacy and anyone could come along and take his place). I really would like to see the two of them on better terms after they’ve both grown past their fears.

Also, I kinda hope we’ll get more Finn stuff in the future. He’s got a lot of potential as a character and I wanna see more of him.

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Anakin and Ahsoka make me so damn sad. I love them both and I love their interactions but knowing how it all ends up kills me. He loved her so damn much and he would do anything to protect her and she loves him and knows he’s conflicted and just… then… season 2 Rebels finale. It hurts!

They make me so emotional I swear.

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Since you mentioned liking Revenge of the Sith it got me thinking about how I’d rate the Star Wars films, so that’s what I decided to do.

In order from least favorite to favorite:
10. The Phantom Menace
Outside of Duel of the Fates I always forget what the hell happens in this movie. I don’t hate it, it just bores me. Kid Anakin is fine though and Jake Lloyd deserved better. (I have seen waaaaay worse kid actors. This little guy was fine, Star Wars fans are just assholes.)
9. Rogue One
Also kinda boring. After Scarif everything really picks up and I like the movie a whole hell of a lot but before that it just kinda drags for me. I don’t feel like I know any of the characters really well and that’s an issue for me. Jyn is closed off (for good reason) but I guess I wish I would’ve been able to get to know her as a character. There wasn’t really time for that, I know, but it would’ve helped. But it also has Tarkin in it, so I guess that’s a point in it’s favor.
8. Attack of the Clones
Attack of the Clones has some of my favorite Star Wars things (Across the Stars, Anakin’s slaughter of the Tuskin Raiders, Anakin being totally torn up about said slaughter, Count Dooku, ect) but it’s still a giant fucking mess. There’s a lot I love about it, but it’s just not super great.
7. Solo
Again, Solo is fine, but it’s not better than the others in my opinion. Alden Ehrenreich did well and I believe him as a young Han. I liked it but there are other ones I like more.
6. The Force Awakens
I like TFA but the issue I have with it is that it takes too damn long to get to the story, imo. Once we’re on Takondona I’m sold but up until then it kind of crawls. It’s an issue I have with TLJ, too, but it bugs me more in TFA because there’s less going on. It’s still got one of my favorite scenes, though, which is Han’s death.
5. A New Hope
I feel weird about not complaining about how long ANH takes to get started when I just did the same thing for TFA but it feels like it works better in ANH. I find young Luke really super charming and sincere so he’s a fun character to follow as the story goes on. It’s honestly just a charming movie.
4. The Empire Strikes Back
I like Empire a lot, just like 90% of all people who’ve seen it. There’s a lot to really love about it, imo. I think I like Lando the best, though, and I totally get why he did what he did. It’s not just the twist that solidifies this movie as a cultural landmark, imo, it’s just that it’s that good.
3. The Last Jedi
This one bounces back and forth between #3 and #1, honestly. I love the film despite some things I would change (it draaaaags in parts). I love that it finally addresses the failings of the old Jedi worldview, which has always been an issue for me ever since I saw the PT as a kid, I love Rose being smart and compassionate and angry (and all of these things compliment each other because they’re kept in balance and drive her character) and that she’s not *just* a love interest but also a great character. Seeing Rey more vulnerable really made her character click for me and I liked her a lot better after this film. I mean, I could go on but there’s a lot in it that just makes me very happy.
2. Revenge of the Sith
This movie. This freaking movie. Like, it’s not a secret that I love some tortured tragic characters but my heart really breaks for Anakin. He’s finally at his lowest, he screws it all up, and everyone has to pay the consequences. It’s so damn Greek. Outside of that, I love Palpatine finally revealing himself and playing everyone like a fiddle. I love the final goodbye between Anakin and Obi-Wan (pre-Vader) where they don’t know it’s goodbye but we do and it hurts. I love the fight on Mustafar (Anakin in black, Obi in white, circling each other like yin and yang in conflict). Maybe part of the reason I love it so much is because of The Clone Wars cartoons, because it really does show what kind of person Anakin was and what he could’ve been. It hurts. It hurts so good.
1. Return of the Jedi
In a weird twist this was actually the first Star Wars movie I ever saw so it gets nostalgia points. I’m still a little afraid of the Ewoks but what makes this movie for me is Luke and Vader. It just does. I love a good redemption story, and I love that Luke’s faith and hope that his father could still choose to do the right thing was rewarded, rather than being punished. This is Luke at his best, when he chooses not to meet violence with violence, but love. That’s just !!! And what other male character – what other male hero – employs a tactic like that? That’s incredibly unexpected and it’s one of my biggest pet peeves that instead of looking at Luke and seeing a character who chooses to lay his head on the chopping block to give someone else a choice he becomes this bad ass lightsaber swinging hero who pulls ships out of the sky. Luke’s power isn’t in destruction; it’s in renewal. (Also I feel like there’s a meta commentary on this very thing with Luke’s arc in The Last Jedi.)

Okay, so that was a bit of a rant but it’s important to be, I guess. Other things I love about RotJ are Leia strangling Jabba, Han being an idiot about Leia’s feelings, Lando leading the run on the Death Star, and Anakin’s funeral.

Sen me a flower, I’ll tell you whatever I want.

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I have a shitload of fanfic that I should be working on right now but I’m answering anon asks and thinking about fic I could eventually write instead. I’m told this is a common fic writer problem lol.

But speaking of fic, I’m actually trying to put things in perspective for himself. I’ve been feeling bad because I haven’t produced as much as I had in years past (I’ve only published eight fics this year) but I’ve written nearly 200k words so that really comes out to less short fic and more long fic.

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Every time I see your icon I want to make a joke about it being Sh-aro but I always forget.

Also, every time I see your icon I feel like Shiro is judging me for liking Voltron fanart but not reblogging it because I’ve never seen a single episode but I still enjoy looking at it.

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I love yarn crafts. I learned how to loom knit last year and how to crochet a few months ago and it’s honestly one of my favorite things. It’s great for keeping my hands busy and getting rid of a lot of the nervous energy I carry around. I’m trying to get the hang of needle knitting but that one’s a little tricky for me.

Also, it’s super hard to feel like you’re not going to accomplishing anything and/or can’t do anything well when you can just create hats out of yarn. It’s a great way to tell depression to bite you.

Send me a flower, I’ll tell you whatever I want.

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I know I’m with like 90% of the fandom on this but I’m so super weak for Ben braiding Rey’s hair. I like to think that he knows at least a good number of traditional Alderaanian hairstyles and would help her do them because keeping tradition alive is important to him and showing that she belongs somewhere and to a people is important to her. I really can’t get enough of it.

Send me a flower, I’ll tell you whatever I want.

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My second favorite Star Wars movie is Revenge of the Sith and I won’t apologize for that. It’s not a bad movie either technically or story wise and it’s a damn shame no one took Hayden Christensen seriously because the visual difference alone between Anakin and pre-suit Vader is amazing.

Send me a flower, I’ll tell you whatever I want.

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Despite being an open book for the most part, I usually need to be asked for information. I keep my thoughts, feelings, ideas, and desires close to the chest and have been known to shut people out and isolate when things get too much for me.

I enjoy sharing things about myself, but I rarely do it unprompted. I have friends I’ve known for a decade who don’t know what I’ve been up to or what’s happened in my life for the past three years.

Send me flowers, I’ll tell you whatever I want.