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When I was four I was given a baby doll for my birthday. He was my favorite toy for as long as I can remember and I played with him constantly. I made clothes for him and everything. The strange thing about this doll was that I named him Philo Klem. I’m not kidding. I have no idea where I got that name or why I gave him that name, but that was his name. And no one ever tried to get me to name that doll something sensible, either. He was just my baby, Philo. 

Send me flowers, I’ll tell you whatever I want.