Yes exactly. And for some reason it also splits a bit for me? I have written serial killer!Dean. His relationship with Cas is not by any means healthy. It’s manipulative and coercive. But I make it clear from the beginning that Dean doesn’t know better and can’t fully grasp that what he’s doing is wrong and he’s mentally ill. Of course that’s no excuse. It’s still a terribly unhealthy relationship especially when he stalks Cas. For some reason that for me is fine?

I wonder if it’s almost a context thing? Because like, Angel Lust is set in a ‘verse where Jimmy and Sam are both serial killers and they don’t really have any issue with actually murdering people. No one in that ‘verse is exactly stable, but I think b/c I’m writing it with the intent to shock, horrify, disgust, and explore these darker things that I’m able to do it. Is it like that with you? Like you mentioned serial killer!Dean and those kinds of AUs usually have certain reader expectations and conventions, so does that change the ability to write it?
I only wonder b/c if I were to try to present abuse in an AU that turned out happy I don’t think I could.